Weigh-in and wrecked

Yesterday was a tough call day. The calls, questions, consults, and patients were nonstop. I got very little sleep and felt like human garbage. It's really hard to function as a normal human being when you haven't slept much in 24 hours. I was supposed to have a massage postcall, but I canceled because even a heavenly massage felt like asking too much. I did, however, keep my appointment with my student loan guy, because I need to get my PSLF stuff going.

I ended up taking my ozempic to work and taking it in the evening, mostly because that's what I've been doing and I hate to break tradition...ish?

Once home, after sleeping for a good 6 hours, I woke up and felt so tired that it felt like even my bones were tired. I had enough time to do a gym trip before my student loan appointment, but I decided against it. I felt absolutely wrecked and a workout would have made it worse. So, I ate my leftover gyro, had some cookie portions, and played on the interwebs until my appointment. After my appointment, I laid on the couch reading my book until the kiddos got home. 

After dinner, I took the kids for a walk so Nasur could have a little down time sans kids and then we came home, did bath time, spruced up Reyah's windows with some Halloween Paw Patrol window things, and then did bed time. 

Now I'm pooped. I'm likely going to head to bed shortly. I'm in the OR again tomorrow and it's going to be another long day. I feel like I'm dying slowly. Only up side is that if I go to bed now, I could get like 9 hours of sleep, which sounds amazing.

I did do a weigh-in today. Down some more ell-bees. Happy about that. I will say that the ozempic is definitely helping with my appetite and eating appropriate portions. Typically, when home alone, with 3 cookies, those cookies would not have been safe. However, I ate a small section of 2 of my favorites and that was that. Also, because I didn't eat lunch until 3:30, I didn't eat much dinner because I just wasn't hungry. Now I'm feeling the beginnings of hunger, but I'm just too tired to make anything to eat.

Yesterday's lunch: mediocre chimichangas with salsa and sun chips (there were no tortilla chips)

Today's weigh-in: 3.4 lbs down from last week

Man, I am slacking on food photos. I'll try to work on it!

Off day

Today was an off day. My mom sent me news this morning that she had finally made the hard decision to put her dog Bailey down. It has been coming for a while. Bailey is 13.5 years old and her health has been on a slow decline. Despite that, I knew this would be devastating for my mom because Bailey was the first puppy she got once we were all of out of the house. She was her little companion. And it's hard knowing that my mom is far away, sad, and that I can't be with her. 

I spent the day in the OR. It was a long day and my plantar fasciitis has been kicking my butt lately, so all that standing didn't feel great. However, I was done shortly before 3pm, so I zipped over to the gym. At the gym, I just wasn't feeling it. I was excited to get an hour walk in, but about 25 minutes in, I was over it. I didn't do a great job hydrating during the day and I felt lethargic and wasn't having any fun. So, I opted to wrap it up at 30 minutes and get the kiddos. 

On our way home, we stopped to get some Mary's Mountain Cookies. These cookies are large and delicious. I've been craving something sweet for the past 2-3 days and I decided to stop and grab some cookies. These were a good choice and I didn't feel compelled to eat like 3 of them, like I usually do. Once home, Nasur realized we didn't have any meat defrosted for dinner, so we got Greek gryos. I only ate half my gyro and fries. Not typical for me, but it felt right at the time. Since then, I have been snagging some leftover fries, but again, no compulsion to finish off my food or eat in secret.

Tomorrow I'm on call again and I'm not excited about it. I'm pretty tired. Three 24 hour shifts in less than 7 days is exhausting.

Anywho, I'm soaking my feet in my fancy ass little foot thing my mom gave me for Christmas a few years ago and then I'm going to do my little plantar fasciitis stretches and head to bed. Tomorrow, I plan to do my ozempic at home prior to my shift. I've never done it in the AM before, so I may also pack it up and take it to the hospital. Unsure. I also typically try to do a Wednesday weigh-in, but I think I may wait until I'm postcall on Thursday. We shall see. No food photos today because I simply forgot. I'll try for some tomorrow!

Gifts/motivation for weight loss

This weekend was a bit more chill for me. I really needed that. It's been go, go, go for the last few weekends. I think I've worked the last 5 or 6 weekends in a row. This weekend was just a Friday night late night shift and an overnight shift Saturday night (7p to 7a). Typically I try to nap before a shift, but my little ol' brain just wouldn't shut down, so Saturday night was looooong with a lot of patients who screamed during labor and delivery. It was a bit intense for my eardrums. When I came back home, all I wanted was peace and quiet and my bed. I slept until 3:30 p.m., hit the gym, went grocery shopping, had Sara over for dinner, and then laid in bed not sleeping (probably since I slept until 3:30 p.m.)

This morning, I weighed in - and yayyyyy!

Yay!

You can see my weigh-ins here. Since recomitting to my weight loss journey, I've lost 19.4 pounds. Now, before I get all crazy and buy myself new shoes (which I promised myself I'd do when I was in the 220s), I want my next weigh-in to remain in the 220s. Since I'm pretty famous for losing and then regaining, I am waiting until I have one more weigh-in under my belt that is in the 220s. Then I'll order my new shoes.

My next big goal will be for the 210's. If I can get there and stay there for two consecutive weeks, I will buy myself two new pair of compression socks. 

Anywho, tomorrow is a fasting day in addition to being a personal trainer day. Usually I don't fast on trainer days, but since I didn't fast today, it was the only day that really made sense. I'm sure I'll be fine. 

Tomorrow I'll take photos of my eats for the day - I promise!

Do you give yourself any gifts/motivation to meet your weight loss goals?

Need the sleeps

So I'd love to do an update, but you know what I'd love even more? A solid 10 hours of sleep. I'll catch you guys tomorrow with a real update.

Working weekends is rough!

Mindless Munching

So today was a longer day with lots of little temptations throughout. To begin with, it was an early one - I had to be at work at about 5. So, I was tempted to sleep a bit more and skip breakfast. But then I'd die of hunger for sure. So, that was out and my butt had to get out of bed at like 4 to shower and make myself some food. I grabbed a protein yogurt shake on my way out the door and made the quick drive to the hospital, updating Nasur on the life of a doctor in America.

Then during our two hour meeting from 6-8, there was a huge platter of donuts, muffins, and bagels with some apples and oranges. I opted for a bagel (which I held on to until my tummy started to rumble a bit after 7) and grabbed an apple for later. I had a blueberry muffin when another hunger pang hit around 9:30 and held out until lunch around 1:30. Today was the first day we had our meal cards (the hospital gives us $1300 for food over a year), so I went to the cafeteria where there were lots of yummy looking options, but I opted for a chicken sandwich and yogurt. Mid-afternoon, I finally ate that apple and by the time I was done with work, I was starving. 

Since I promised to grab some stuff from Trader Joe's for the family, I headed straight there and picked up their requests as well as a chicken sandwich and some fruit bars. As I was chowing down in the car, I realized I didn't care for the sandwich nor did I care for the fruit bar. And then I realized that I do that all the time: I eat an entire package/serving/bowl/whatever without actually liking it. And I do it mindlessly most often. Because I go on autopilot when I eat: see an entire plate of food, eat the entire plate of food. I think we all do that and we're bred to do that - popcorn at the movies? Snacks while we work? It's just stupid. It's also a lot of calories I don't need, so I'm being a bit more mindful about it!

Anywho, it's only 8:15 and I didn't get to the gym, but I'm going to go drag my butt to bed for like 12 hours. I'm exhausted. I have a free personal training session tomorrow, so I'll let you know how that goes!

Here are some photos from today:

Breakfast: eggs, cantaloupe, blueberries, banana bread

The last of the chicken sandwich I didn't eat

I liked the nutrition facts, lol

The texture? Ew.

Spotted banana snack when I got home - the best kind of banana snack!

1 serving of fruits and veggies per 8 oz, so 8 oz for me!

Snacky-poo

Do you do any mindless munching?

Coming soon: legitimate-ness!

I didn't want to let down my millions of readers by not posting anything, so I'll post some excuses as to why your real post is coming tomorrow:

1. I forgot to weigh in this morning because I didn't put my camera in the bathroom last night
2. I'm really tired
3. I still have like 6 pages of reading to go until I'm done with what I wanted to accomplish today (8x10 pages with teeny font and no pictures - don't judge)
4. My knees really, really hurt (not sure how that's related, but it is)
5. I still have to wrestle Bailey into submission and give him his thyroid pill

So, a legit post will be in this very space tomorrow

Photos and Zumba

Today was my preceptor's late call night which meant he was in no hurry during the day. This would have been fine, but I was itching to get to Zumba. I hadn't gone for a week and I really do look forward to shake my booty. My preceptor is also superhuman when it comes to hunger. He didn't call for a lunch break until 1:45. Are you serious? I eat breakfast at 7:15ish everyday. That's 6.5 hours without eating. Fortunately, I usually carry a fiber plus bar in my pocket during the day and today I was able to run back to the office for a banana inbetween my patients and meeting up with my doctor. But being hungry and not eating is so not good for me cuz it sets me up to binge. Fortunately, given that I only pack so much food, it's not usually an issue, but if I were to eat at the cafeteria, I'd be in major trouble.

Moving on. My preceptor got a complicated patient near the end of the day and I think he realized how useless I was around 5:15 because he told me to brief him on my last patient, leave my progress note, and head out. So I got to leave at 5:30, which gave me plenty of time to run home, marinate my fish, and change for Zumba. 

Zumba was a lot of bouncing today. I wore my heart rate monitor - 740 calories burned. Bam! I burn more calories doing Zumba than anything else. It's great because I actually like it. When I got home, it was time to cook up the fish and make some asparagus. Now, I'm not usually an asparagus person, but holy fuck, this recipe was awesome. Now I'm eager to add more asparagus into my meals. And having a dinner planned ahead of time was super helpful in avoiding just grazing, like I did yesterday.

All in all, it was a good day. I've still got some more studying to do before I turn in for the night, which is unfortunate for me, but tomorrow's Friday, so I'll be fine. Here are all the photos I've neglected to upload:

Breakfast the day of my exam - carbs for brain capacity, eggs for protein, and watermelon cuz it's the best

My new backpack. I got a new one for Christmas, but it lacked an outside pocket and functional compartments for my needs

Because it was so pretty!

Made some guac with half of that pretty guy

Guac!

Used the other half for the epic sandwich

Vanilla milkshake

Today's food - I couldn't figure out what to pack for the "main" part of the meal, so I just didn't pack anything...

Today's breakfast - no eggs because there was no time

Tonight's freaking awesome dinner featuring wild caught salmon - DELICIOUS

Today's positive: branching out and trying a new recipe and liking it!

Grocery shopping while hungry = terrible idea.

I took pictures of some of my food today, but I'm too lazy to upload them. I'd say I'm sorry, but I'm not. 

Anywho, I delivered one baby via C-section (I did two sections yesterday and 1 vaginal delivery) and then did outpatient this afternoon. I got out right around 5, came home, changed, and hit the gym. Then I decided to do my weekly grocery shopping because I was running low on some staples and because I'm working an overnight shift Friday and I have to work all day Sunday so I knew I wouldn't want to do it over the weekend.

You should never go grocery shopping while hungry. 

Duh.

You'd think I would have learned by now. Buuuut, I only bought one cupcake rather than a whole cake...so, progress? I was really craving a cupcake. Like, had been since last week, so I figured it was legit. I also bought cadburry Christmas chocolates. Bad idea. I will eat them all. I'm taking them into work tomorrow to share cuz I realize now post-hunger craving that I shouldn't have bought them. At least they were on sale...?

And now I'm going to wash my face and head to bed because tomorrow promises to be a long day as well. I do really enjoy OB/GYN, but the hours are rough, folks.

Hem/Onc Challenge

Today's been a weird day. Well, it was an exam day and exam days are always weird days. They throw me off completely. Mostly because I either don't sleep the night before the exam or because I sleep for like 2.5 hours. Well, last night, I'm pretty sure I slept for almost three hours - you know, so much sleep it's ridiculous. 

Anyway, usually, I go home after our noon class and then sleep away the afternoon, wake up, go grocery shopping and then have a completely effed up sleep schedule for about a week. Well, I didn't want to do that to myself this time around, so I decided not to nap. I did spend a lot of time laying in bed, but I was conscious the entire time (Seriously. I was). Now that I'm awake and whiling away the time until I can go to bed/watch the debate, I figured I'd update you on some new things in my life/shock you by informing you that I'm super lame.

So, this morning's exam was kind of hard. I placed my studying emphasis more on the book material than the lecture material. That was a bad choice. So, that stressed me out. Like really stressed me out. To the point that I thought that I had failed. Now, this wouldn't be a big deal if I were a first-year because each class has more than one exam. However, if you fail an exam second year, you have to make it up over Christmas break - you know, during the time that I'm supposed to be working in a hospital in Uganda. So, I was freaking out thinking that I was going to have to reschedule flights, study over Christmas, etc. Turns out, I did fine. But whoa. Rough, rough morning.

Class was okay. We're starting a new domain: hematology/oncology. It's going to be hard. Like really, really hard. It's the hardest domain of the semester. So, I'm probably already behind despite the fact that it's the first day. That's awesome. I really need to do well (obviously), but I also want to make sure I don't lose myself in the process. This past domain (which was our shortest at two weeks), I was weirdly sick, didn't do such a hot job of planning meals/food, and didn't go to the gym much. I don't want this to happen again, especially since I have a lofty goal of losing 20 pounds before I leave for Uganda. So, I need a schedule. And one that I'll actually stick to.

So, I'm going to do a challenge within a challenge. I'm going to call it the hem/onc challenge and I'm hoping to pull it off for the next four weeks. I'm planning on getting in bed around 9 and waking up at about 5/5:30 everyday - maybe giving myself an hour or two leeway on weekends. This way I can get to the gym, get home, shower, get ready and be at school at about 7:30/8:00 everyday. This gives me the ability to get an awesome study room and to utilize the day better since I tend to slack off during the evening. I'm also going to try my very best to log the calories I burn (with my HRM) and the calories I eat.

This is going to be hard because logging takes time, but I'm sure that it will be worth it - it's worked in the past. Sooo, here we go. Twenty pounds in 54 days. Gah. I think I can do it!

Also, we went to the bar tonight to celebrate passing musculoskeletal. I had a beer (despite not drinking this semester because well, I really effing earned it). So, here's a picture for you.

Shit's getting real...tomorrow.

So, tomorrow is my shit gets real day. You will get a weigh-in (so not excited for that) and you will get some food pics for the first time in oh, you know, forever. But, I'm content to go to bed right now after an awesome family dinner. Love these kids!