A History of my Eating Habits

So though I've shared some of my story of how I got so fat, I wanted to talk a bit more about what makes losing weight such a difficult thing for me.


I've been overweight for as long as I can remember. Yes, I do have pictures when I was skinny, but that was so long ago that I'm not sure it counts.

My brother Tristan, sister Malena, our dog Tessa, and (skinny) me

So where does it begin? Well, in addition to living a pretty sedentary life, I don't remember a time when I ate healthily. I was pretty young when I was able to tuck away entire quarter pounder meals from McDonald's. I could easily eat an entire bag of popcorn as a snack before bed in elementary school. And polishing off a bowl of ice cream would only make me want more.


As the pound crept on, I began to hate anything that required physical activity because I simply couldn't compete. I remember being mortified when we had to run a timed mile in middle school. And in the eighth grade, I clearly recall not being able to do one sit-up during a fitness test. So, instead of trying to do a sit-up, I probably just ate more.


I think I picked up all my bad eating habits in my youth. Growing up, my dad was always sick with migraines, and so we couldn't have chocolate in the house (chocolate has caffeine in it, which exacerbates headaches). But, when he was gone on business trips, my mom got us oreos - a delicious and simple pleasure for a kid. My sister, brother, and I would instantly turn into vultures the second the oreo packaging was open - we needed to eat as many oreos as possible because soon they would be gone. So, I never learned portion size.


At dinner time, my mom was always the first to finish her dinner. She said she picked up eating quickly when she was in college because she was always on the go. Well, because I was a somewhat competitive child (I blame it on middle child syndrome), I used to eat as fast as possible to beat her. So, I never learned to eat slowly.


On top of that, dinner was typically always at 6:00 p.m. And if you didn't eat then, you typically didn't eat at all. It didn't matter if you were hungry or not. So, I never learned to eat only when I was hungry.


Now, I'm not trying to blame this on my parents (especially because I know my mom reads this - love you, Mom!). Really, their eating habits were quite healthy, but I guess I just picked up some bad habits along the way, and they stuck.


But my eating habits are what make this whole journey to health a lot harder. It's difficult trying to undo 23 years of damage. I still have a hard time eating just one cookie. I still have to put a lot of effort in my portion sizes. I still have to really think about how hungry I am. But I'm making a little bit of progress everyday, and I credit a lot of it to SparkPeople.


SparkPeople.com is the website I use to track my calories - both eaten and burned off. They help me shoot for healthy ranges in terms of what I need to eat and in terms of how many calories I should be burning everyday. In fact, they'll even set up meals and exercise plans for you if you want them to. However, I like to have a little more freedom than that.

My SparkPeople home page - click to make it bigger

Another thing I'm trying to do is eat less more often during the day. Mark (my personal trainer) has really encouraged me to eat every 2-3 hours so that my blood sugar stays up and so that my body doesn't try to store what I'm eating for fear of not getting fed again. I also drink a lot of water during the day so as to shed some of that water weight.


Anyway, back to today. I don't have many pics of my food, but here are some of my portion-controlled and calorie-logged meals!

And now I must go to bed so I can be up early for the gym!


How are your eating habits? Do you struggle with anything?