Since chatting with you on Tuesday, I've met with my trainer again, seen Trainwreck, gone to bed at 7:30 and worked until 11 p.m.
On Wednesday I had another training appointment with Troy. This time he created a circuit for me that was pretty hard. First, I did plate pushes, followed by step-knees (where I held some weights and stepped up on an aerobic step), followed by plate pushes again, followed by inchworms, followed by push-ups, followed by sit-ups, followed by battle ropes. I did that twice and then did a circuit where I kept doing the activity until he told me to move on to the next one. After that, I did some wall sits and then did some more battle ropes. It was a hard, sweaty workout and I'm glad it was a full body workout - last time we just focused on back and shoulders and I felt as though I didn't get that great of a workout. This time was way better. After training, I rushed home to change and run to Jimmy John's before meeting up with some other residents to go see Trainwreck, the new Amy Schumer movie. I thought it was pretty good. I'm not her biggest fan given that she can be a bit crude, but I laughed a lot and enjoyed myself.
On Thursday, I was really tired. Likely from staying out so late (read: past 10 p.m.) and I ended up really slowing down during the day Thursday. Thursday was also a fasting day, but I didn't do a great job because I went to Trader Joe's after work and ended up eating a whole bag of turkey jerky (which is only about 250 calories), but I also ate a bunch of watermelon and shrimp. So, I went over my calorie goal for a fasting day and felt kinda shitty about it. Shitty enough to weigh myself Friday morning and discover I'd made no weight loss progress.
Friday I had the distinct pleasure of working the long shift - 7 a.m. to 11 p.m. My Fridays are usually pretty chill with ultrasound in the morning and clinic in the afternoon. Then I covered consults and C-sections in the evening and there were a lot of them. Go figure. But I liked being able to stay busy until I got to go home.
Today I woke up, showered, and went to see the chiropractor for the first time. Given that I'm an MD, most people in my profession think that chiropractors are not real doctors since they never went to medical school. However, they learned something I never did: how to manipulate people's musculoskeletal system. Anywho, since about May, I've been waking up with really bad low back pain and hip pain. It usually goes away a few hours after I wake up, but it's pretty excruciating when I have it. So, I decided it was time to give something a little less traditional a try.
The chiropractor explained to me that my SI joint were probably out of whack. He explained that lying still on a misaligned SI joint could lead to the kind of pain I was having in the morning and then he adjusted me. He told me to take the rest of the day easy and the real test would be after I'd taken a nap or gone to sleep for the first time - basically, would I still be in pain after waking up? Well, I'm happy to say that after waking up from my nap today, my low back didn't hurt for the first time in at least a month. So, I'm pretty pumped about that. My hips are a bit sore, but I'm pretty sure that's because things have been so massively adjusted. I'm planning on going 1-2 times a week for adjustments for a while. He's being very kind and working with my schedule to allow me to come after work.
Those are my highlights. My lowlights have been some crummy feelings lately. I think I expect a bit too much of myself personally and professionally. I still feel as though I don't know what I'm doing at work and that I have so much to learn that I'm never going to be a competent physician. I know I have to suck for a while, but I'm having a hard time swallowing that pill. I'm used to putting in a lot of work and seeing some rewards, but no matter how hard I try, I'm still slow, stupid, and not so great. On top of all that jazz, I haven't lost any weight this week. So, I'm just a bit down on myself. That being said, I was told by a nurse this week that I was the star intern, so maybe I shouldn't be so damn hard on myself.
Anyway, I'm headed off to work a night shift (7 p.m. to 7 a.m.). Then tomorrow I'm headed to see a med school friend, who will likely help me ground myself in real expectations.
Three photos for you:
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| Dinner/breakfast today |
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| Thursday's breakfast |
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| Wednesday's breakfast |
What do you like to do when you're feeling down? Depending on how down I'm feeling, I'll either talk to someone, work out, or completely avoid all the things.
Love you. You're doing great. I'm feeling real dumb in the MICU too. Today a nurse literally yelled at me for not knowing how to put particular orders in the computer. Yeeesh. Long hours. I'm thankful for scrubs (expanding waistline), GREAT seniors currently, and some positive feedback. I watched The Duff on my day off this week. It was really funny and good. When I'm getting down on myself I talk to Ysais, force myself to spend time outside or read.
ReplyDeleteI, too, am on my own weight loss journey and I've been told countless times that you often gain weight or don't lose weight the first couple of weeks of new or higher intensity workout routines due to water retention. That's a possibility.
ReplyDeleteWhenever I'm getting down on myself about a lack of weight loss, I try to remind myself that I didn't put all of the weight on in a matter of weeks or even months so it certainly won't come off that quickly. I also try to remember that when it comes to indulging (in moderation), you've definitely got to live a little! If I try to eat clean and healthy 100% of the time, I burn myself out and binge eat. I usually try to stick to 80-90%.
You're doing great though! The fact that you're actually trying to eat healthier and lose weight is much more than most can say!